Time to be Mary

Frank and I are heading off to see the movie "Jesus Camp" this weekend and based on the reviews and commentary, I'm sure I will have a reaction and a deep conversation following the viewing. Interestingly, I had a strong religious upbringing, went to private Christian Schools and continue to attend services when the spirit moves me or when I need an infusion of Gospel music. Having studied and listened to the stories from the Bible my entire life, I often feel themes bubble to surface at different times in my life. One story in the New Testament, the one with Mary and Martha, has always troubled me. Oddly enough, I thought it was much more detailed than the four verses in the book of Luke.

[38] As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a
woman named Martha opened her home to him. [39] She had a sister called Mary,
who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. [40] But Martha was
distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and
asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by
myself? Tell her to help me!"
[41] "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, [42] but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

Luke 10:38-42

Not very long, but I've always wondered why the person who took on the role of a care taker for the guests was chastised and the woman who, in my opinion, shirked her duties was praised for doing what was better. Call Mary a dreamer, a thought leader, someone who has the time to eat bon-bons with Jesus and Martha is the driver. My mind is filled with all of the personality types that have been trademarked to illustrate the human behaviour. I remember when I did the California AIDS Ride 5 back in 2001, the organizer kept talking about the "dreamers" who would make a difference, about the thoughts that would change the world. My reaction was to look around and see the organization, 2000 people moving at a snail's pace through California and magically my tent was at my destination, a shower was waiting for me and three meals had been organized. It was a well-run ship, one that "dreamers" could not accomplish without someone doing the foot work. It's all well and good that the thought leader sat down and pondered, but equally important are the volunteers and the people that execute the thoughts into action. I tend to fall in to the later category and am far more comfortable with a plan of action than spending hours and hours talking about what needs to be done and then delegating it to someone else.

As a man of action and raised to help ensure that my guests are comfortable, I've identified with Martha. I've been told recently that I am almost freakishly good mannered because I took the time to send a few thank you notes to colleagues that I worked with. To me it's odd that more people are not freakishly good mannered, since it doesn't take a lot of time and is simply an execution of a plan. I hope my mother is proud! I can imagine Martha fuming. She understands that there are guests who are probably hungry and with everything that needs to be done, she needs help. But where is her lazy sister Mary? Sitting at the feet of Jesus. Now I understand that it is also important to step back and listen, to get away from the duties of life but it is also quite frustrating to feel taken advantage of by doing the work while others assume the duties will be taken care of. Of course, Martha could have taken a different approach by going to Mary directly and asked for help, finished the necessary items, then both of them could have sat down with Jesus for a chat! Hmm.

I've resigned my position at Franklin Templeton after nearly six years of employment, and after spending a lot of time doing the hands on work, I'm taking a break for two weeks before starting a new job at Kaiser Permanente. I call it my time time to be Mary, but unlike the Biblical Mary, I did transition my duties, made plans, finished projects and now am settling in for a much needed break. It's my time to eat bon-bons with Jesus and think about what the future holds.

There are a few concrete details that I am aware of that really excite me. I don't have to meet deadlines, don't have to attend meetings, and for a short while, I can just sit down and listen. I'm very excited about this time of my life since in a few short weeks, I'll have to join the Martha's and be responsible. And this is, in the words of Martha Stewart, a good thing.

I will miss working with some truly amazing people and while I am a little apprehensive about the ambiguities of starting a new position, it is also very exciting. People have asked why I am changing jobs now, especially since we are at the end of the fiscal year and bonus and merit increases taking place in the near future. Yes, I forfeited my bonus, but I will have a bump in my salary. I will also save approximately 12 days in commuting and have a different role and responsibilities. Again, it is a good thing.